To Recapture the Dream

Contents

Beginning the Journey

To Jesus through Mary

Forged by Suffering

Transformed by Love

Words that were Works

Foundation

Go to Section 2

Section One: Called by Name

To trace the path of spiritual growth of one of our own kind, is to find our own deep longing. To know another  has gone before, is to find encouragement and hope and perhaps a way of living that will lift us - with our ordinariness and failures - to a place of giftedness and joy.  In that other, we may find a meaning to the quest we hold of life and love, and all the hopes and dreams of God. It is to find a friend, who tells us that in the end, the one thing that matters, is to love, and love with no restrictions; a friend,  who in her loving shows us Love returned for love.

All things lead to this, that it is God who first loved us, and our one task is to respond, wholehearted, to the call of  God, who mothered us forth because of love.

What it is hoped to do - within these pages - is to share the journey of grace and growth to Jesus, through Mary, with our founder - Mary Potter.  From the first, let it be said that she must speak for herself. There is no room to question, doubt, or seek to put a modern twist on things that happen.  She speaks for herself in the language and the style of her times. She speaks as one who, raised as she was, within the confines of her time history, and social circumstance, and is both limited by them, and freed from them, by historical ‘accident’ on the one hand, and by God on the other.

It is the belief of the writer, that whatever difficulty we may have with language or style of expression, the universality of this woman’s journey into God, transcends the difficulties of history. Her spiritual path enlivens ours, for if she, cosseted pet, child of a broken home, limited by her education and her social/economic situation, and the religious hesitancy and fear of anything out of the ordinary, as well as by her own psychological and physical limitations, could rise above all things and enter into the life of union with God - why can not we?  Mary Potter’s journey shows us a path to holiness that is available to all. This she knows. This she elaborates. And when it came time for her to found an order to do work among the people of God, it was this path she made the heart of the community.

The beginning of a Journey Back

What is it that brings a person into intimate union with God ? Is  it a ‘special’ grace - given to some and not to others?  Is it a result of a life of asceticism, and hard mortification, or is it the simple gesture of a benevolent God towards those people who manage by an effort of the will, and by the loving impulses of their hearts, to believe in God, and in God’s loving providing, as a child believes - simply, purely and with boundless hope?   Jesus said “Father, Lord of heaven and earth, I offer you praise, for what you have hidden from the learned and the clever, you have revealed to the merest children” (Matt. 12:25), and perhaps it was because Mary Potter was a simple, naive young woman, who sought nothing extraordinary, that God was enabled to enter into her heart. Perhaps it was her situation, her temperament, her simplicity, and her awareness of being      loved that let God flower within. She writes: 

 With the blessing of obedience, I look back and gain a good thought at once, for I see revealed a tale of love that reared a child to love every one, and this is a lesson I trust my children will take to themselves - that if they wish (those who have charge of others) to do them good, it can only be done by love.....
Sitting in the twilight which my mother loved, I used to hear from her over and over again, tales which told of God’s providence in my regard......
I would sit on the floor with my head in my mother’s lap and she, playing with my curls would go on...”And you know, Trotty dear, I was confirmed a few months before you were born, and it must have been the Holy Ghost gave you your happy disposition.”  How often I heard that I saved my mother’s life, as before my birth, consumption was taking her.  Whether her account of her confirmation impressed me I know not, but I often find myself, in the brief thanksgiving of the Particular examen, thanking God for blessing me before I was born.” (A.N. p.1) 

As dear little “Mary Potter”, I knew your little saint when she was 8 years old, and a sweet quaint little child she was.  Being a year older, and a bulky girl compared with her, your angelic foundress and another child of her age - Ada Stevens - had the idea that my knowledge far exceeded theirs.  On confession days, we three went together to the Cathedral. The two dear children placed themselves one on each side, so that they should consult my young self about preparing themselves for their confession.  In low whispers they, each in turn asked what they were to do. After the answer had been accomplished, the whispered question came alternatively from each “What next must I do?” When all questions were answered and advice followed, these two dear children entered the confessional in their turn. As a return of the compliment, they were willing to impart their experiences in the confessional. Of course, the innocent act of courtesy was declined. Many more trifling incidents could I write , did time and strength permit.  Though of little value to the world in general, yet these little remembrances are very dear to old me. (Letter from a sister of the Convent of Mercy, Midhurst, Sussex, 22 April,l917. Letters Series M).

Miss Potter was a perfect Musician. It happened occasionally when all was ready for High Mass, no organist turned up, then she was called to play. I used to watch her feet, using those pedals, for it was a huge organ.  A boy used to use the bellows for her, and one morning, when all was finished, he turned to her and said: “We played well this morning, didn’t we Miss?” That boy had many a shilling from her. She loved the poor and loved giving.” (Recollections - Originals. Mother M. Cecilia Smith)

It may be difficult for some to understand how a girl in her teens could be as simple as a little child.  It (was that Godfrey) was but another brother, and when, in order to fulfil what I was advised by my director - to be a spouse of Jesus either in the world or in the convent, in releasing me from my engagement, he said: “Mary is incapable of earthly love” - what my governess had said of me before. I think my engagement to Godfrey must have been unlike others. We were never alone, either my Mother or brothers accompanied us wherever we went, and I remember on only one occasion, Godfrey offered me his arm, and one of my brothers said: “Mary must be ill to take Godfrey’s arm!” This was the greatest familiarity which took place between us. I used to think how nice it would be to have a little house to ourselves and spend our lives in good works. We could be like our Lady and St. Joseph.  One day I told my confessor this, and he at once said to break it off, which I did. (A.N. p.3)

What a grand work is a good mother! To my mind nothing is like a good home, not even being brought up in a convent by good nuns......My mother was learned as well as holy, and it was  beautiful to see my brothers, who were all fairly well read, appeal to my mother for dates, historical facts etc.  I never heard a disrespectful word being said by them to her, nor even a disrespectful look.  I never heard an untruth from their lips.
It may seem strange, but I believe that part of my knowledge and love for our Lord was mingled with my love for my brothers, the youngest of whom was nearly three years older than myself.  Our Lord was my heavenly brother, indeed, what I saw of other men would bring our Lord to my mind, for my brothers were very careful whom they brought home, and it used to pain me so to know most of them were not in the Church. These thoughts would keep me recollected, as much as a formal meditation. I would look at them, singing and playing, gentle and kind, and think they must be saved, they must be brought into the Church, and I would be singing and playing myself.......I had no      thought of evil. I did not know how.” (A.N. p. 4)

One thing I used to feel, perhaps more for my brothers’ sake than my own, was the attitude of my mother.  When little, I must not play with them; when I grew up, I must not go out with them. Nothing would move my mother on this point. They would fix on the most innocent entertainment of  “dissolving views” for some Catholic charity, but no.  They would be so pained but ever respectful. My mother had some fixed idea that she could not be too careful of me, that it was a solemn charge given by God.  How grateful I am now for this guard of me which kept me from the knowledge of the world; but to me them, it was an unsolvable mystery and I looked upon it as a kind of hobby. Why should I be kept like this?  Being delicate, I understood why my mother acted thus in what related to me health, and was rather glad that it freed me from school earlier than the others and I loved my home so...... (A.N. p.4)

“...(she) has not the slightest human respect in these matters.  The people in Church waited in solemn silence, on a Sunday too, in consequence of my being expected to play, but I, all the time, am kept home by my mother.  I simply mention this, my mother has sterling qualities. She does not herself see that being 29 I might be left more free, and she tells the people I am obstinate....” (Letter to Mrs. Bryan, Nov 27, l876)

In my childhood and teens, my practices of piety were from a sense of duty, as even (when ) entering the convent. Poor Doctor Grant! He chose for me a convent in which to learn religious life. I thought he meant me to join...........It was not until leaving I was told that Dr. Grant had written to Reverend Mother of the great interest he took in me and his thought that God had some special designs in my regard, (and) that as I knew nothing about religious life, he had sent me to them to learn about it, and the different orders that formed it. But, as they said to me, they had not told me as they did not know about other orders, and they no doubt thought that as I was so happy with them, it was not a necessary (A.N. p.7).

Mary entered the convent  in l868. She was 21 years old, significantly sheltered and of a ‘spiritual nature’.  She had a deep devotion to Mary, but from her own account, was more concerned with doing the will of others rather than her own. Within the Mercy community, she found she found a natural niche for herself. She was naturally obedient, self-effacing and seeking to do what she felt was right.  Again, a docile spirit, and a desire to please her good God and Mary, to whom she was a special child, led her to perform her duties with a devotion that was noticeable ( M.M. Hilda, Sec. D.p.4 ). Her sensitivity and self-consciousness are revealed in a statement she makes about her clothing ceremony:

I remember the day I was clothed, having a cross. It was such a pain to have to wear a dress which left me very uncovered. I was afraid of being disobedient in spirit, and all I could do was to unit with our Lord, stripped of his garments, as I had to go before a crowded congregation, band playing, etc., but it was Jerusalem below Calvary to me.  I was in our Lord’s arms on the Cross. I said after, that I would not like to go into my mother’s presence like that, and my Novice Mistress consoled me, saying she would not like it either.  They were so good to me, and petted me so, that I wondered why the same thing should follow me into religion and went to Rev. Mother and asked her would she not humble me. (A.N. p.9)

“....she was remarkable for charity, humility a strict observance of the rule, and a marked devotion to our Blessed Lady.  We none of us doubted her holiness. A Jesuit Father who gave us our Retreat, marked her out as a “very holy soul”.  Upon her entrance here, I remember to hear it said, that the parting from her mother was a great wrench, which was equally meritorious to both. I also remember to have heard her playing very favourably criticised (sic).
With regard to school work, she could not keep the attention of a class of children for any length of time, but could teach just a few beautifully. She was most amicable in her intercourse with the sisters, and when she was told that her weak health was considered a difficulty in the way of perseverance, she accepted the sisters decision without a murmur (sic), little knowing the future work in store for her. I have copied the following from our register:
“Miss Mary Potter entered on 7th December l868, being 21 years of age. Received the Holy Habit on 30th July, l869, left 23rd June, l870.” (Letter from S.M. Evangelist, St Joseph’s convent of Mercy, Bristol Road, Brighton - Letters, M).

From the memories which come to us from our founder, there is a feeling in her of ‘election’ - that she was indeed ‘called by name’. A heightened sensibility? Perhaps, but in her later years she would see the hand of God hovering over all her life. 

 Dear Jesus, do I not know that unless Thou hadst led me on with sweetness, the unction of Thy love, I should not have responded to Thy call.  Thou hadst ordained from my childhood, Thou hadst ordained ere my birth by my mother’s consecration of me before, and at the instant of my coming into the world, that God, having chosen me, as one chooses a piece of marble of which to make a statue, or it might be more correct to say accepts what is offered to him - so God accepted my mother’s offering, and then our dear Lord strove to make it less unworthy of Her acceptance. May He be blessed for ever and may the angels be praised for their loving care of this child of earth, who is more and more grateful to them. (AN. p.5)

They had been most indulgent to me at the convent. The Novice Mistress was an old school fellow, and knew how delicate I had always been - not allowed as many hours in school as the other, not allowed to paint, on account of my chest, and never allowed out on wet days.  But  though they were so kind and thoughtful, it was too much for one who had never done anything, even make her own bed. God bless those good nuns, who raised my idea of a nun.  By intercourse, by living with them, my idea was not lowered, but exalted, and though more than thirty years ago, I look back with the same love and reverence. (AN. p.8)

My room was to me a sanctuary, and I spent hours in prayer when those of the house were out at High Mass or Benediction, which I was considered too delicate to attend, and therefore had these quiet hours in what to me was a sanctuary.  I remember the feeling being so strong - that it (the room) must be kept holy, as though there was a prevision of what would happen that room - that, finding they had put newspapers, according to an old- fashioned custom between the mattresses and the iron bed, and not being allowed to lift the mattress, I would get under the bed, and pull them away for fear there should be anything in them not good, (which I imagined there must be - as I was not allowed to read them).
I had always a lamp burning at one of the altars, for I had two altars, which my Mother kept up for years after I left for the convent.(AN. p.12)

To Jesus Through Mary  Back

As a child, Mary Potter had a great need to be loved and admired, as well as a great need to love others. Of these complimentary needs she wrote: “ From a child, I have wanted to be loved by others, and to devote myself to them”...........(and) when I grew to be a girl, the love of four elder brothers and others was not sufficient for me” (AN.p16).  This desire to love and be loved was, in the years within the convent and during the long convalescence, turned towards God and his people.  Solitude is a stern teacher of the hungry soul, and the disposition that needed so much love and devotion “turned to God with still more energy to devote myself to Him” (AN p.16).  So what happened to Mary Potter, in the long days and evenings in the solitary room she called her ‘sanctuary’?

It seems that, during this period of her time at home, she began to explore a spirituality that was but lately come to England, but which had a long and honourable tradition in the Church. Three things marked her natural choice in finding a way of developing her spiritual life to fall on this spirituality: Her love of Mary, her own simplicity and willingness to love others in that spirit, and her great desire to grow in the love of God.  The spirituality was of course, the Montfortian spirituality we call ‘True Devotion’.

De Montfort’s Treatise on True Devotion - or more correctly, his “Preparation for the Reign of Jesus” that has been popularly called ‘True Devotion’ - had been rediscovered in l842, and an English translation prepared by Father Faber of the Oratory, in 1862.  Who introduced Mary to it, we do not know, but by l873/4, she was herself preparing a manuscript (The Path of Mary), to assist others to come to love and enter the spirituality as she did.  (M.M. Cecilia’s Reminiscences sect.II, dated l868)

This spirituality offered to Mary Potter the means of preparing herself for the reign of Jesus, but making an act of complete abandonment.  At the core of De Montfort’s spirituality, which is not for those with ‘grown up wisdom and maturity’, is the simplicity of a child.  De Montfort wrote:

The Most High, the Incomprehensible, the eternal and all powerful has just now been born. Is it possible? The Eternal is a day old, the Word is in silence The All-Powerful has become a child. Let us acknowledge, Adore, Praise, Praise, Love and acknowledge Our God reduced to infancy....... ....whoever wants to be an all powerful king, according to our Master, must be a child. Let us then listen to a little baby,  let us then learn, His sweet Lesson.... (Canticle xvii Ouevres Completes)

“....what objection would you have to the  devotion which leads you to try to live in as close union with our Lady as our Lord did, when their lives were one and He was yet unborn: to the devotion which leads you to be united to our Lord as our Lady ever was in soul, though their bodily lives separated?” (Virtue Letters No. 3).

What ever the objection of her director, it seems apparent from Mary’s own words, that the practise of this spirituality, led her into a close intimacy with our Lord, and burning desire of her heart, to be conformed totally to Christ, so that He may live in her. Through Mary, this could be achieved:

It is through Mary (that) all comes to me. I was named after her alone. I was given to her by Dr. Grant’s wish; later on, I had your permission (for which I pray God to reward you) to give myself to her for time and eternity.  Since then, what my Mother has given me could not be told. But I must say this, that the answers to prayer (and I have only  wished) are more like what are read in the lives of saints.  If others consecrate themselves in the same way, they would find the same. I must say that in her honour. (Letter to M. Virtue, No. 3. p.8) 

Through her intense and often painful struggle to grow into Christ, through the abandonment of her whole self, Mary was preparing for that for which all human souls are created - a wondrous visitation, and  God indeed visited her, and filled her with his love. He would also reveal to her the path she herself was to follow, in making the kingdom a reality on earth.

The quick impression on the eyes of my soul of Jesus Crucified.  The Divine Will manifesting itself to me in the most mysterious manner. The work of Calvary. The impress made in a most mysterious manner but it would seem in the same way as molten wax receives the Divine Impress, and so it continued, God deigning to let the echo of his voice sound in my soul.  “It is my will that you do this work.  Honour the Heart of My Mother, and when in anguish, I will come and comfort you”. And on our Lady’s birthday some forty years ago He came, dear Jesus, in His own sweet way, making earth seem heaven. (ON. V.5 p7)

The facts that show the Divine origin of the Little Company of Mary, I find myself reluctant to write upon. I hover near it, I commence to speak of my room, intending to speak of God’s visits and the wonderful favours He there accorded me.  One thing (as I am allowed to write freely, just as the thoughts come into my mind), treasure that crucifix.  It was not in my room, but in the quiet parlour, which for hours would be as silent as a Trappist Monastery.  My sofa was opposite that crucifix, and with all the world shut out, knowing little that was going on in it, I remember, in obedience, writing that first little book, the Path of Mary......”(AN. p12).

What were those experiences?  In the first instance, she writes of an intense, mystical experience of God, and of finding in that experience,  her true self:

God visited my room with a series of marvels, and, simple as I was, unread in mystical theology , or even ordinary writings upon devotion, still I knew that God’s manifestations to me meant something great, something indeed of moment.
How speak of that marvellous visit - that Presence! The question of the little atom - the answer of the Creator “the Blessed Trinity who made Thee”.  Then, the way of the Cross made in that rapturous presence.  How go back and relate these things I do not know! (ON. Vol. 5, p12).

after  the wonderful visit God made me, when He first spoke to me it (my happiness) grew greater, and the very air seemed to breathe of joy, like the garden of Eden.
I was too shy to speak to my confessor, so I wrote - and the remarkable thing is certain that I knew not what was coming, but week after week, the whole plan of the Little Company of Mary was gradually unfolded, one feature after another.  It made a complete plan, that had nothing to do with my mind.............
.....returning to the manifestation God made to me, it went on for some months, certainly not discouraged by my confessor.  (Extract from Private Notes of the Founder, copied by M.M. Cecilia dated l902)

“How did I dwell  with thee, my mother, as in a calm sweet sanctuary, living by thy very breath: it seemed thy heart animated mine.  I assure you, my Father, on different feasts, I passed into different stages of the spiritual life, as though I was with the infant Jesus, my arms around Mary’s neck, or I nestled into her bosom and fed upon her substance.
From the mystical birth, through the hidden life, the public life, on to Calvary, step by step the way of the Cross with Jesus; and then, that wonderful union whilst, standing before that Crucifix: “Thou art my spouse”.  “Spouse of Jesus Crucified” was the chant of the angels.  Washed by the Precious Blood, wrapt, enfolded in the embrace of the Holy Spirit.  What has God not done for me? (ON Vol. 5. p12.) 

I did not know, did not ask why was this, what did it mean?  Now I know.  It was the way others were to walk. May the holy angels lead many into this sweet way of Mary, to which God attaches such graces.  It could not be explained, the union with God, the joy.  The world seemed another world, and to breathe of God.  I would wonder whether it was not a return almost to the original joy of the unfallen.  I went about my few duties the same, making home happy, entertaining my mother and brothers, but I had many hours to myself. This union with God has gone on increasing, and is not disturbed by the various businesses I have to attend to, or by being very little alone. I cannot describe it.  I almost seem to cease being aware of my own existence, God seems to have such entire possession of me. If I was to  sit and meditate as some books advise, - to think, for instance, there was a time I did not exist, - it would be a distraction. I love to think of creation, and yet I seem to have been with God creating.....but my meaning may be misunderstood. Those whom God enfolds in a similar manner alone could understand me.(op. cit N.5 p.12)

Last Friday during the three hours, I seemed raised upon the Cross, and our blessed Lord seemed to tell me he espoused me, but I took not much notice. Last night, Sunday, whilst going through the stations, I was thinking of Jesus being nailed to the Cross, when the words came.... ....I stood before the Crucifix where I have told you Almighty God  brought me back to himself. and with the thought of our Lord hanging upon the Cross, I felt he was binding me to Himself by a new title, as his spouse. .....it is a title I have a repugnance for myself...I could be his slave, His child, the little thing He stooped to lift out of the dust, but not his spouse, and I prayed he would not do it, and then He seemed to tell me it was the wish of Mary, and when I thought of that Mother’s heart at the foot of the Cross and likewise the thought that the nearer I was to our blessed Lord the more I could do for others, for His people and my people, I let the work be done in me, and it has made a revelation in me.   I would wish to go away and cast myself in the lowest place, and be punished as I deserve, but I cannot go away from Jesus, for He has bound me to Himself. (Virtue Letters no.5 p12)

In the day of my consummation, may I be found consummated with thee”. Jesus I wait. Thou hast lifted me up with thee upon the Cross. Thou hast there drawn me to thyself.  Grant me from that cross to say with thee “and now holy Father, I come to Thee”.  Soon, if it please thee dear Jesus, soon call and bid me come to thee. I am thine O lord my God, all thine.  Thou answerest me my sweet Jesus ‘thou art mine, all mine, thou hast possessed me from the beginning of my way. I have possessed thee since thou showdest (sic) thy self to me O Lord. Since then, have I ever lost thee? When thou wilt call me, O God, I know not. I wait.
I have cried out from the cross with thee, Father forgive them for they know not what they do’ and waited, and thy own sweet voice  spoke the word “This day shalt thou be with me in paradise”, and I rejoiced when I understood from thee of thy Mother’s work - of my own Mary’s work, by which so many that word would be spoken - sinners, dying in sin.  Again I have followed thy voice, speaking to Mary, commending to her thy church: Woman behold thy son, son behold thy Mother, and my heart grew more glad to know that the day will come when my own mother Mary will be proclaimed Mother of the Church. I may not see it, the church will consecrate itself to her Mother Heart. (ON.  V.1 pp.1-2)

The grace to honour the Precious Blood was not well received, but it persisted in Mary and became more deeply refined and restated.  The blood of Christ was the source of life for us, the place of Mercy’s great  source of nourishment and strength.  Jesus offered himself for our salvation. From the heart of Christ flowed the  streams, the torrents of love in which sinners are freed from their bondage, the hungry are fed and the sick healed. Mary would write:

As the infant sucks life from its mother’s breast, so let man feed from the heart of Jesus, and live by his Blood, who shed it for them that they might live.  Methinks the angels wonder, as they watch men, parched, dried up with thirst - and yet so near the everlasting fountains, the torrents of the Precious Blood, (which brings) to souls all that is soothing, all that the soul can desire, giving inexpressible delights to the being made for bliss and joy.     “Come”, Jesus calls and Mary leads her own. Drink and be inebriated my beloved ones. Bathe in the saving streams of the Precious blood. Be pure, be holy, be happy with the joy of the children of God, the delight and content of the children of the Mother of Holy Hope. (ON Vol.5, P.22)

The presence of our Lady after communion: My Mother!....My child! my own child. Speechless, silent, I simply delight in the presence of Mary, then I am sensible that our Lady has the divine infant, holding him out to me, and with a sense of unworthiness I half strive to say: Depart from me, for I.......” But I simply say: Can you trust me with him?”  and I fear, and again I ask, “Can you trust Him with me?”, and I strive to think how I can be more recollected, slower, less hurried. How can I keep him with me? Mother, is there anything that hinders the entire reign of Jesus in my soul - anything in my mind, my soul, my body, Mother, I ask you to remove it. You are all powerful.....And He came.  Blessed be the name of Jesus forever. Blessed his visitation.  (O.N. Vol 3,  31)

 As if it was not enough to have a penitent and spiritual child who claimed she had had experiences of being at one with the  Trinity, and finding herself in the grace of the Godhead,  and that she had been given infused grace of knowing Christ in Mary and experiencing within herself the reality of Jesus as person, lover, Lord, Monsignor Virtue is faced with a further problem... that of discernment. Unfortunately for him, he seems to have followed the principle Cardinal Manning was to use in a later episode of Mary’s life - the principle - which is not in itself bad, is that if it is of God, it will stay, even if you deny it utterly! Mary Potter was     about to suffer intensely, because in spite of all her  own best efforts, and her own desire not to be     ‘extraordinary’ in any kind of way, her God kept drawing her to himself in a most extraordinary way. She wrote to  Mons. Virtue:

Now I write because I have been told to do so. God has put his Holy Spirit upon me.  The Holy Trinity overshadowed me and communicated to my understanding, darkly it is true, but with a clearer knowledge than heretofore, how the holy spirit, proceeding from the Father and the Son, is the Link of the Father and the Son.  The breath of Life.  That breath was breathed into me, and I was told henceforth I must live by it.  I am bound to God by His Holy Spirit, in some faint way resembling the act of the Holy Ghost within the Godhead, and may the spirit of God now guide me to show you, as in the deepest humility, I acknowledge my utter unworthiness to speak this aweful mystery.  The Holy Ghost is the Indissoluble Bond, the limit of the Godhead, and we are filled with His Holy Spirit and bound, espoused to him for evermore.....(Virtue Letters, No5)

What is amazing about this piece of writing is that it  is a personal experience of what writers on the mystical life speak of....a progression into the unity of the Trinity through an experience of the dynamic life of the Trinity.  How can Nineteenth century words convey the awesome power of such an experience of God, or of the radical effects within the person. Here Mary Potter is describing what William St. Thierry and Hadewijch called ‘the living life’ of the Trinity.  She seeks to describe the infinity of movement of pure love that is the Trinitarian life, and seeks to make another aware of the wonder of our participation in that life. Jan van Ruusbroec, flemish mystic described it this way; “There the Father finds and loves us in the Son, and the Son finds and loves us with the same love  in the Father, and the Father and the Son embrace us in the unity of the Holy Spirit, in a blessed delight, which is eternally renewed, ceaselessly, in knowledge and in love, through the eternal birth of the son from the Father, and the outpouring of the Holy Spirit from them both.”(Davis op. cit., P149)

Here is awe!  when the soul is caught up in the wonder of the light of the Godhead, and empowered, within the limits of the human mind, to know God directly. It is the highest form of grace that we can know, and yet within the ecstasy the agony. The agony of trying to translate the untranslatable; to convey what words cannot describe.  Here too, the suffering of heart and mind, the grief of misunderstanding. But in it all, the certitude of God within , and not simply in the self, but in all others.What Mary Potter experienced, through the pure gift of God, she re-states in yet another experience:

This morning at Holy Communion, it was said (to me): Thou shalt honour my Holy Spirit.  During my visit to the Blessed Sacrament, our Lord spoke to me of the worship of His soul for the Holy Spirit, of the burning love of His Sacred Heart, “Thou shalt love the Holy Spirit with thy whole heart, with Thy whole soul, with Thy whole being”, and now his work is consummated, though not commenced on earth, except within myself.
The angels and saints see that God’s work is done, and praise Him as the angels praised Him whilst the earth was but chaos.  They saw its creation in the divine mind. The heart of Mary, The Precious Blood, the Holy Spirit, with such then shalt thou fight and conquer. Good God, with these do I present myself in prayer to God, and the prayer I breathe to Him is His own Holy Spirit, whom He has sent to me, and I breath it back to Him, imaging thus the procession of the Holy Ghost in the Blessed Trinity, and God supports me, as I could bear the pressure of the Divinity upon me. Loving are the Holy Angels to me.  If I visibly saw them, I could not more sensibly know their ministries to me. (Virtue Letter No. 7. P15.)

On Saturday evening, when I got up and came down, having received in the evening the gift of the Holy  Spirit, I felt I ought to be away, and I felt too, and know, God has given me a great power of impetration. I must use it. There is a sense of responsibility in it.  Souls are dying, souls made to the likeness of the Blessed Trinity are being lost. It seems as though they belonged to me, and I could not bear they should be taken from me, anymore than a mother could bear her children to be torn from her..........Those whom you would help are made like to Jesus.  It is God’s will they should be prayed for....” (Virtue, ibid.)

This call to pray  for and to work towards the saving of souls is heightened still more by an experience which  Mary writes of to Father Selley, some time in l876,  after she has gone to him for direction.  She says, in an undated letter:

Another thing I want to mention is a grace that seemed given me the year before last, on the Feast of our Lady’s Expectation.  A new love came up in my heart, which has gone on increasing and increasing, namely, quite a different feeling, a mother-love for others. I cannot explain it!  It may seem foolish, but God knows how I have wept and prayed for those whom I do not even know, and how it grieves me to think that there are souls now in the midst of the world’s temptations, who ought to be with me, but I have no house for them. You could not understand the intensity of feeling there is in  me on this point, and I do think a radical change has been worked within me.  One day when I had been praying “praebe mihi cor tuum O Maria”, our Lady seemed to reply: “I have given it to you.”  I always had a loving heart, thank God, but this is quite a different feeling......” (Letter to Fr. Selley, undated, Series D)

As regards what might seem extravagant to you when I spoke of the Blessed Trinity - is it not what goes on within the souls of all who are in the state of grace?  Are not the processes of the Holy Trinity imaged within their souls, though all do not realise it?  Do we not pray by the Holy Spirit through all do not understand it? 
As regards my union with our Lord on the Cross, “With Christ I am nailed to the Cross” - “I live, now, not I, but Christ liveth in me”...may I not say that?  As regards offering the Precious Blood through the Mother’s suffering Heart - I would ask anyone to test if there is a more efficacious prayer in this world, or one more calculated to draw God’s spirit upon us.
Could delusion teach these things?  Could delusion make you love others so much that you are almost sorry when you feel your suffering (suffering of soul, so far worse than suffering of body) going.. feel almost sorry because your prayers, though more pleasing to yourself in happiness, are more efficacious when suffering? (Virtue, No. 8 Pp16ff)

”He (Jesus) left the happiness of heaven to save souls.......(and) if I had the choice...I would choose to live in imitation of our Blessed Lord and save souls....ever since then, my thoughts are constantly in the Passion” (Virtue 3, P.7)

It makes me so happy, the thought of our Lady’s heart being within me, and such a comfort to think that by it I can always please Jesus; myself (sic) was something so nasty for Him to be with, but with the heart of Mary, I now love Him and keep Him, and ever offer that Mother’s heart before Almighty God, pleading for her children and loving others, and seem to feel myself some of the pain that Mary felt which the love of others causes ....(Virtue, No. 2, P5-6)

If you rightly understood the graces I tell you God has given me you will wonder.  They follow so quickly, they are so numerous.  I must tell you what, however, you will know hereafter by experience.  Those who practise “True Devotion” of De Montfort, receive graces from God on account of their being wholly given to Mary, that many saints have, so to speak, earned by years of labour. I hope you will believe this, or you will think differently of me to what is true.  When this devotion becomes more known, which I pray God may be soon, how saints will increase. It is not yet three years since I practised it, and wondrous has been the change it has brought within me. (Virtue No. 5 P13)

God is present to me, not in his usual way. He has replenished me with His grace. He has filled me with His love. He has poured forth His Holy Spirit upon me, and told me to live by It, and now I live no longer in myself, but He, my Lord and God, liveth in me.  Loving Him I must love those whom He has made, not with my own poor heart, but from the Heart of Jesus that poured forth its priceless Treasure of Precious Blood to save them; from the Mother heart of Mary that was pierced and broken for them.  My own heart has seemed ready to break but our Lady helped me so that I could ask Almighty God not to ease me, if my grief could help a soul in agony.  Strange if I have been deluded  by an evil spirit that every grace has increased within me. Strange that sorrowful as I have been made, I was never happier nor more peaceful in my life. Strange that I should see more and more my own sinfulness and nothingness, and grieve over my sins.(Virtue,10:22) 

“I would like to imitate Mary in everything, and it seems to me, if there were one thing more than any other that induced her to leave her retirement, after the death of Jesus, it was to assist again at the death of Jesus in the person of his members. It must have been an attraction to her dear Mother heart to help those who were dying because they were her children and because she saw Jesus in them.”(ibid)

The second area of development that took place during  the time of great spiritual growth into union was a real call to what we could call ‘evangelization’.  With a fine understanding, Mary realised that whilst the graces given were given to her, they were not, in the last analysis, for her.  They were for the world.  If such awareness and communion with God is indeed true, the natural corollary is that they are accompanied by a growth in love and loving communion and concern with all God’s people, as Bernard of Clairveaux wrote in his commentary on the Song of Songs, when he set out to urge others into the pursuit of love.  For Bernard, there were stages in the growth into contemplative living. His characteristic emphasis was, that in the life of the contemplative, action is the fruit and overflow of this intimacy of the soul with God:

In the first place, we ought to have compunction; secondly, devotion; thirdly, a hard working penitence; fourthly, works of piety; fifthly, earnestness in prayer; sixthly, the repose of contemplation; and in the seventh place, the fullness of charity.” (Song of Songs, XVII.6)

The effects of Mary Potter’s union with God in prayer, made her flexible - ready to act as God directed, though only from this direction of love. It was not a self seeking, but rather a self giving that was response to Love itself.  Initially, it took the form of constant prayer for those who were, like the thieves on Calvary, dying.  In the Calvary motive, the need of the repentant sinner for the grace of conversion - and Mary’s witness to that were a trigger for action. The horror of the soul who dies without such grace and bears the burden of the loss of the light of God - as witnessed by the unrepentant thief, was the contrast. It was the pain of these - their own pain, and the pain of Jesus and Mary for such as these, that led her to seek them out, and bring all the lost home to their rightful place in the kingdom.

This desire to share the fruits of her own encounter and union with the Lord would result in two things. A deep desire to tell everyone how loved they were by God and a real commitment to spread the good news of Jesus. One of the real gifts was, that Mary felt that she could not merely show them the wonder of God’s love for them by being an expression of that love , but also that she had a way for them to find what she had discovered. Namely a way of going to Jesus through Mary - a spiritual path  - that was indeed for the poor of the earth.  This ‘little way’ would be the message of love she had to bring to all who needed to become children in the kingdom.  The actual works of the apostolate would follow, and were themselves based upon graces given.

The graces God was bestowing on Mary Potter were great, but we need to consider that against the high gifts of his presence, there was also the darkness of the quest. In Mary’s soul - as well as in her body - suffering was to play its part in forging her into an image of her beloved Lord. 
 

  Forged by Suffering  Back

One of the least welcome facets of the human condition is the reality of suffering. Suffering of body, mind and spirit, is part and parcel of the human condition. It is not ‘of God’, in that God does not, and cannot will suffering for his people. He loved enough and longed enough for his people to be free from the pain of suffering, that he sent his Son, Jesus.  In one sense, Jesus redeemed suffering, by taking it upon himself. No matter what the affliction, Jesus, son of God, son of Mary, has been there before us - in his human agony and spiritual dereliction on the Cross, in the leaving of his friends and family, in the persecution of those whom he loved and with whom he wanted to share his life. Jesus did not remove the pain of suffering, nor did his undergoing it, somehow sanctify suffering.  What he did, was willingly endure that the Father’s will be done in him. Suffering may indeed sanctify us, and God may indeed be praised and glorified by suffering, but only if we can walk with confidence through the shadow of death, clutching the hand of God, knowing that somehow, somewhere, there is a point at which the suffering, and the willed endurance to not let suffering deflect us from the One, who is the one thing necessary, becomes less something that is to be endured, and more something which may be offered as a participation in the joy of the Lord. The suffering does not disintegrate, but we become less emotionally and physically debilitated by it, or indeed, dependent upon it.

Mary Potter knew suffering. Not simply suffering of a body that was often in pain, but the suffering of mind and heart that was sometimes due to the persecution of others, sometimes to the feeling of being abandoned by God, abandoned by friends. Sometimes she suffered from the hyper-sensitivity  of her own soul to the evils that seemed to surround her at any given time.  Yet, all through her suffering, there seems to have been a growth in the ability to abandon all things, even suffering - to let God be God within the pain, the anguish and the fear. 

The very union with God that Mary had experienced led her into suffering. How could it not, for from those whom God seeks to bring into union with himself (and is that not all of us?) he demands a participation in the Cross. The gate is indeed narrow.  Not everyone wills to enter it, for to enter into that sign of contradiction is to enter into a freely chosen willingness to suffer. Writing to Elizabeth Bryan, later to be Mother Magdalen in the first Little Company, Mary Potter wrote:

I do so feel for what you have gone through.  I understand that wretched feeling of groping in the dark and seeing no way our.....Though so painful, it is no doubt most salutary to the soul, fortifying it for what it must have to bear if it is going to take up the Cross and follow Jesus. As regards our sensible feelings, they may easily mislead us. I am so glad you are more comfortable, however, at the present - but you must look out - there are ‘breakers ahead’! (Letter to Mrs. Bryan, Sept.12, l876) 

During this time of sorrow, I had only occasionally bodily suffering. At times I would think it would be relief if my body was in pain, it might distract me from the fearful anguish of soul, which nevertheless, I bore without showing, and did my few duties, which consisted mostly in going out for walks with my mother and brothers, listening to them, singing and playing, mending their socks and so on. So I had hours to myself in the day, and used to come down from my room as if nothing was going on within me.       I sought comfort from no one, confided in no one. I have never thought in trouble that anyone could comfort me but God.......When my confessor told me it was a mortal sin to believe in these, to me, inspirations, God permitted this, no doubt to pierce my soul in the most painful manner possible. I do not think it could be understood how literally I took what was said to me in confession. The words were so impressed on me “He that heareth you, heareth Me”, and I did my best, but I could not succeed. Then, as I trusted my confessor so implicitly, the though was intolerable - If this was not our dear Lord within me, then I must be possessed. Then I would think, is this how the heretics feel when they believe wrong doctrine - they feel they cannot help it?
 I would leave off praying when I could not help these thoughts, they were part of myself. I was under an influence stronger than myself. Jesus and I! That blissful union I had had, I was afraid now to give way to. I ought to have known that I did my best to put the thoughts away, and therefore did no wrong. I had not then made my vow to do what was most perfect, which prevents doubts about having sinned. (AN. p.11)

Here is the soul in anguish - caught up by God on the one hand, and brought to darkness and fear by doubt and confusion on the other. Here is the soul who has not yet come to the total emotional detachment from all created things and the true humility that enables one to act with power and grace in God.  Through the darkness, the groping, the dread of sinning, the fear of falling into something that was less than perfect, Mary walked in a kind of blind faith, trusting that in it all, there was God: In retrospect, she would write;

 God permitted me to have this fear of being a thing displeasing to Him whom I loved more than myself. Then would come the thought - surely is I were in such a dangerous state, I should be lost, but I knew it would be sin to think that, and had to put that away.  All through I went to Holy Communion daily, through sometimes, I would have to go to confession first, through a scruple of having been disobedient, but I fought against that perhaps more bravely than anything, for I had a wholesome horror of scruples, and made up my mind I would go to Holy Communion with this uncomfortable  feeling, rather than give way to a scruple.     (AN.p.11)

Suffering, as we can see in the passage above tested the faith and the hope of Mary Potter. Her dreams and hopes and faith in the experience of God that had impressed itself upon her life, were being tested by the very agents she saw as reflecting God on earth, his ministers.  Over the years of contact with Monsignor Virtue, there was a constant struggle. Her sense of obedience to the Church - in the person of its ministers, and her own perception of obedience as leading the soul into perfection were now in conflict with an obedience owed to God himself.  He had called her, and had stamped his seal upon her. What was she to do?  Simply endure, until God’s time came upon her? Or use creatively the darkness and the awesome fear of despair? 

....you (Msgnr. Virtue) argued that it was a bad sign when I told you I have no peace when I obeyed you, I spoke too strongly.  It grieves and distresses, I feel I am trying to convince myself of what is not true, but the real  grief is the though of my not knowing whether I have our Lord with me, or am possessed by an evil spirit.  I see plainly now, that that thought  must be a temptation. The devil probably seizes the time when you have been telling me to put away from me as delusions what I have told you, to renew the old temptation I have had since a little child,  - to think I am altogether in the wrong way. Almighty God’s spirit would not cause the anguish I had only last week, when I seemed to wrestle in a very agony with the thought how did I know I was not possessed by an evil spirit.  I must not listen to the voice that had told me “I am with thee always”.  It might have been the devil speaking, and my pain seemed to reach a point that could go no farther, and I cried, “My God, why hast though forsaken me.” (Letter Virtue, no.10)

I do not say much about bodily suffering. There are doubtless numbers who suffer more. If Father Selley meant in soul, I can only say, anyone who has read the last years of the life of Anna Maria Taigi, where she speaks of herself as feeling as though she were in a corner of hell, of despairing of God’s mercy, of being tempted to doubt there was a church at all; and these temptations coming at a time when she was deprived of spiritual consolation, would read some description of what I suffer, but even then would not understand it. I understand hers by my own.  Do not think I am unhappy or have lost my peace. Not at all; those times do not continue.  I am cheerful and happy. Regarding spiritual consolation, I have long disregarded it, and not noticed it, so the deprivation is hardly though of.  My happiness for years has been to know that God is happy, and in that, consists my happiness........It is my one great wish to do the Will of God.....To accept everything as coming from the hand of God is my usual disposition...(Letter Mrs. Bryan, Dec.1, l876)

It was in the will that this found its direction: “ We so often lose grace, by not offering up the many ways by which we are obliged to deny our own will, whether we wish to or not”, she wrote to Elizabeth Bryan (Letters August 8, l876), and it is this seeking always to conform her will to the will of God that purified her suffering. She would come to see this as necessary for those who came after her:
It is important that the first members of this Little Company of Mary should possess a great fortitude, and a devotion found in the Will of God, seeing Him in all the seemingly adverse occurrences because what seems to us adverse, may be in reality, just the reverse. Calvary itself was seemingly a failure, the enemies of God appeared to have it all their own way, but it was not in reality so! (op. cit, August 28, 1876) 

“I give you my word, there is no one who has given up home, brother or sisters, mother or father, children or property for me and for the gospel, who will not receive in this present age a hundred times as many homes, brothers and sisters, and property - and persecution besides, and in the age to come - everlasting life.” (Mark 10: 29-30)

My God, why do I so constantly desire penance, and God shows (sic) that in the centre of the being of his little one, He, Essential Purity, produces from the fallen nature, hatred of itself, alone satisfied by penance.(O.N. Vol. 3, No. 103, p.48) 

Whilst I do penance as a sinner, my Jesus, how thou dost stoop to me and embrace me, pressing me in the wounded arms, drawing me to they sacred, suffering heart, showing me its workings and desires whilst on earth.  Why is this? That our hearts may be in accord. My Jesus, I see the throbs of thy sacred heart, the pulsations of thy blood, longing to be shed. Jesus, ever offering thy blood for thy loved ones, my Jesus, let me unite every pulsation. When in pain, in penance, the coursing of my blood, in my veins, I unite with thee.  ......Jesus, what can I do for that beautiful  human family, lovely in its variety, its various offices on earth. Jesus, I would help. Let me suffer for each, I commence with the children of this age. Let me bear punishment for those who brook not control, correction, .........(O.N. Vol. 3. No. 110, p51)

Transformed by Love   Back
 

Encompassed by God, drawn into the wonderful creating power of the Trinity, finding herself as a part of God, and other human beings as like parts to herself, there is wonder and awe in the consideration of Mary Potter, that she, the whole of the human family and the world which God himself created, were ‘charged with the grandeur of God.’

The task of the world, and all its people, is to glorify God, the ‘All Mighty creator’.  From the moment of her revelation of ‘the Blessed Trinity who made thee’, Mary Potter was drawn into the sheer wonder of God’s merciful love - his great beneficence in giving the gift of His Son, and the great mercy and compassion of the Son in giving his Blood, his life for the saving and the sanctifying of the world. From this encounter a spirit of joy and compassion sprang up in Mary’s heart:

After God’s visit, what a wonderful new spirit rose is me.  I had been a very happy child, also  girlhood gave me my heart’s desire - the world  smiled on me. But a spirit of joy came upon me  after the visit of the Ever Blessed Trinity, a spirit of joy indescribable, and  what, in thinking over it even as I now possess it, I should say, it is a reflection of the joy that came into the world with its creation It is not spasmodic joy, coming at prayer or at intervals, but a constant joy, a pleasure in all around, a pleasure from sights and sounds. How to express it is difficult. Many rise to the song of a bird, and to sweet music, but my soul rejoices as a I look upon a poor workman, as I hear the singing of a machine.
How yesterday did my soul melt as the poor old charity men hobbled, candle in hand after our Lord - and delighted in the consecrated virgin, the Sister of Charity, ministering and walking with them. This joy, it seems to me, makes sorrow more poignant, but they can and do exist together, though the sorrow, at times, is most sensible. The sound of a saw or a machine, the wind, the wet, each have their own special joy - a joy which (as far as I know,) is not shown, but the soul wells up and we wonder that fallen creatures taste whilst still in a fallen world, such joy that makes the soul sink into deeper and deeper insignificance, and knowledge of its own unworthiness.
Joy opens the mind and we revel in God. God’s unfallen creation was full of joy.  Innocence lost. Is then human creation a failure?  Ah no - a new beauty arises from the mighty mind of God - REPENTANCE.”  (ON. Vol 5. p.2)

For Mary Potter, to repent was to sorrow for sin - not merely her own sins, but for the sins of the world which was shaped by God’s hand, and destined to give him glory.  Her task was to offer the suffering of her heart that mercy might pour out upon the world: Jesus had said: “I will show forth my Mercy in thee, I will show my Mercy by thee (Virtue No.10. P.22), and it was this gift that Mary would devote her whole life towards portraying:

It is to that Divine Attribute of God that I devote my whole life , and what is the visible form - I mean the actions of Jesus represent the Blessed Trinity.  How does God show his Mercy?  Jesus with outstretched arms shedding his Blood, his Life. (Virtue, Ibid). 

......could I wish to come down from the Cross?  Our Blessed Lord has hold of me there, and the tighter he holds me, the better it would please me, if I were allowed, but the hard obedience I have at present, is not to wish even to suffer, this I find very difficult. I am constantly longing for a closer union with Jesus, and what is that but to suffer.........no one could know the suffering being Mother has brought me. If a sister is in a wrong state, I feel it in my soul without her telling me, likewise I feel relieved and joyous, before I have even seen her to know if she is alright, when the temptation is gone, or the sister sorry for the fault committed, and the more love, the more grief in the thought of what our Blessed Lord must have suffered when He knew so many of those would be lost whom He so loved. The mere possibility is so terrible to us, what must the certainty have been to him. (Letter to Fr. Walker, May, 1879).

A voice seems echoing in my soul which tells me “I am loved”.  Timidly I say, “By whom?” Over me, around me, I feel the Essence, root of all Love - God. But timidly I approach Him, feeling my utter unworthiness.  There are creatures of love to whom I appeal.  They surround His Throne.  Holy, Holy, Holy.  Others look upon the world of love He created with pity, with compassion, and the ministering angels descend to earth with their heaven given gifts, and we feel that the echo in our hearts came from them.  Yes, I am loved. (Miscellaneous Letters “T” P.140) 

My Jesus, I find in my heart a desire to lean upon someone, to be supported, protected, therefore, as there is no lawful desire of our hearts desires, in harmony with thy will, that thou dost not give, you yourself has bid me lean upon thee, that you would outdo the most loving, most considerate, tender of earthly lovers. Mother, place me closer to my love. ...condescend to my littleness, sweet Jesus, love the work of thy hands.  My mother, help me lean upon my Beloved. (ON. “A”, p.20) 

What would any creature on earth desire, if they knew how their creator loved them?  What heart could wish greater love if it realised but a little of thy love, my Jesus:  Who would feel lonely, knowing thou art ever near.  Who would want someone to lean upon? Not the one whom the angels watch from their heavenly home, and see walking in the desert of this world, leaning on the arm of their beloved.  That one is coming up from the desert. Yes, on to the home of her beloved is she hastening. She is going direct. He is leading her and leaning on him, she feels no weight. She is strong, leaning on his protecting arm, which she knows will never fail her. She leans upon him, and her steps are blessed.(op. cit). 

The world is not weary to her, for she walks, works for him alone.  She rests upon him with content, she knows he will not withdraw to let her fall. Jesus invisible guides the steps of his child, and awaits the moment when he may manifest himself to her and show to the angels the fruit of his passion, and crown her in the heaven above, where the Eternal Father and the Holy Spirit will receive and bless her for ever.(ibid).

We have chosen suffering as our portion as spouses of Christ crucified.  Spouse of Christ crucified! What does it mean?  Look it in the face. See rather, in the face of Jesus on the Cross what it means....It means, when the limbs ache and there is not rest they must be united with the limbs of Jesus aching on the Cross, when the pains shoot and fever burns in the veins and the hands are hot and the tongue parched, all this must be offered to dear Jesus. It is the portion of the spouse. The throbbing head must rest on the thorn crowned head. it will not rest there, but it will give glory to dear Jesus, and be encouraged to suffer on without rest, without comfort, waiting God’s time for relief....and with our agonies of soul) we must ...stand bravely....we throw ourselves out on others and enter more into their joys and sorrows and spread peace around from our breaking hearts, and it is well, we wish it so, since the most high wishes it, and we ask not for relief. It comes.  We could scarcely live long if we had not relief. The relief comes, and we are grateful, as our Mother (was) at the Resurrection, and we know whether in sorrow or in joy, all must be for the glory of God.....(ibid ) 

Jesus, live in my soul and let not my body drag me from thee, but may my maladies be received in the spirit and for the end that thou hast sent them.  Thou will not send more than I can bear. Yes dear Lord, you will, you do let me remember (that) it is yourself, your grace, by which alone I can bear. Leave me not to myself, I pray thee.
“Come my child”, and the child is strengthened at Jesus’ wounded side. Let me remain Lord, my love, and give to Mine. May they suck strength and sweetness, as I whom thou hast so favoured. I have all when I am with thee, strengthened by this most sweet Precious Blood.  In the calm sanctuary of thy wounded side, there is the stillness that breathes of another world. Let me not leave thee. I will work with thee and thy Precious Blood will bless the little that I can do for thee.(ibid ) 

The spouse sucks sweetness from the wounded side of her Lord and loves all his loves. She follows him whithersoever he goes.  In spirit and in reality, where she can, she walks with him his mortal life.  She loves all his loves. Open thy  heart sweet Jesus, to all my children and draw them close to thyself, that living, loving, meditating truly on the emanations of thy Sacred Heart, they may indeed learn its spirit and their works be ever unworldly, performed for thee, with thee, in thee. Daily may they search the recesses of thy wondrous heart of love.....(AN “A” No.12)
And this will be the work of spouse of Jesus  glorified. She will echo delighted, the emanations of the heart of her spouse, in his wondrous love dealing with mankind. She follows the lamb whithersoever he goes, rapt with the ever fresh and fresh revelations of his love. (ibid) 

Always to save souls....the constant theme of Mary Potter - to save souls, to save sinners dying, to bring the lights of God’s goodness into the hearts of human beings created in his image and likeness. This was the task of one who was called to be a ‘mother after Mary’s heart’:

Mother, look upon earth’s fields ripe to harvest. See thy flocks.  See the wandering sheep and lambs. See the homeless, friendless. Mother, my heart feels more for the friendless. than even the loved poor.  The poor are not generally friendless., but, ah me, see the numbers of frail women who have no home; the governesses, servants, maids, orphans or worse - numbers of God’s children battle on alone, and this is not in the Providence of God. He has designed otherwise. And Mother, we see the desire of thy heart to fulfil this want.  Help us to put it into execution, and really find a home for the homeless, friends for the friendless., parents for the orphan.  A mother continues persevering despite all difficulties, all loves. This is thy plan dear Mother, but into what hands have you placed the execution, we need workers, overseers. Mother, where are they?  Bring them, bring them into thy service. Promise the payment - thy own sweet self.” (ON Vol 5, No.71, p57)

But there was more than this. Each follower of Mary was expected to do what Christ did. Not just in theory, but in practise.  Not one area of life was to be left unexplored....the sick were to be ministered to, the suffering consoled and comforted, the poor fed, the children instructed and the ignorant taught to love our lord, for 

“Mission work is one of the works of the Little Company of Mary. It is very evident that God wishes us to be occupied with his vast family, since he has so blessed this work wherever the Little Company of Mary have engaged themselves helping the priest with his mission work. What blessings have been attached, what souls saved. Conversions, instructions, united with our interior life, help to our own sanctification as well as to the extension of Christ’s kingdom. ( ON. Vol. 5. p.2) 

Along with the burning love of God that had inflamed her heart and soul, was the burning love for his people. With the passion of a mother seeking out her lost child she would search the world and batter heaven:

My angel, whisper a word for my people, the people of my Jesus whom I love. They are mine, for has not the Father given us Jesus, and has he not with him given us all things.  I want that people. I long for them to come to my Lord. What can I do? When, O when will they be one? My angel, whisper a word that will be a work.” (ON. Vol 5. p. 22)

Sweet Mother, Mother, you are a Mother, you compassionate your child. You feel for my bodily pains. Your compassion is a reflection of God. When, by your help, I am in heaven, you will not be able to exercise your sweet pity. I thank you my Mother, for this sweet compassionate love. It is another link to God. My soul draws nearer to my God through you. You are a manifestation of him. He shows himself through you. Mother, how can I make more know this - God shows himself to us with a mother’s undying, unchanging love. Can a mother forget the child of her womb? It rings through our hearts and thrills our souls. They melt under this warmth of love, the love of a good mother.....(ON. No.22 p.24)

That look of Jesus upon the world for which he died - if it were not his by right, he has earned it. He has purchased it. He has brought it forth in pain and anguish. What his heart sent forth over Jerusalem, his piteous cry, his pleading, telling us of his motherlove, his desire to gather us to his breast. Salvatore Mundi - See Jesus, saviour of the world looking upon it...(ON Vol 5 p23)

 Jesus, it is too much. I am in a fallen world. Joy like this, what does it mean?  Jesus, my own.  The immense God is mine, my Own.  I live not.  Poor world that know not its God. And suddenly in the excess of joy - pain, piercing pain. And I offer  that world to Thee. It is Mary’s world. It gave you Mary. In the vast Universe, my God, behold      this tiny world. Save it, my God, mercy. Let it be your own again. Let Mary reign.(ON. Vol.3, No. 33, p.14)
 My God, how I love them (thy People). They are thy  Images, sons of God. Save them. Souls, souls have cried out, apostles, missionaries. Souls, souls must be saved is the cry of the Apostles.  There is a prayer more efficacious than even the Apostles. That cry is the prayer of a Mother’s heart.  Hear O God, the prayer of her whom you have made Mother of your people. Jesus listen......Mother, standing on the shore of the eternal ocean, how you watch your children steering their barques on the river of life. Tenderly, anxiously, lovingly watches that mother. The children of God, intent, some of them, piloting their little boats, see not, hear not that Mother. Some are not rowing on to these Eternal shores, where the Mother, God-appointed Mother of all mankind awaits.  Sweet Mother of Jesus, pity, plead.  They are the images of God, and they know not their fearful risk. It is impossible to realize that dread eternity without God. A faint, faint shadow of that fearful future, rather, eternity, and that to us who live in light greater than the generality. This light is given us that we may help others, but they know not what they do  (ON. Vol 3, No. 47 pp19-20) 

It was not only the people of God who echoed his glory, however. There was in Mary Potter, a fine understanding of the gift of Creation.  Life was gift; the place of living - the world - was also gift. To live in the world with truth, dignity and true humility meant that the world itself had to be valued for what it was - a garden given by God for his children to play within. Everything on the orb of the earth was given to reflect the wonders of God. The earth, like the children of men, was to give glory to its Creator. Not for Mary Potter were the words “this miserable world, this wretched life”. The words were not truth; they reflected only the self interest of humanity, its discontent and incapacity to understand  what Creation was, and the song it sang to its creator:

What does it mean?  God help us all and give us sense!” This miserable world; this wretched life”, These expressions, so hackneyed, so constantly used, not alone daily, but hourly - what do they mean?  I feel inclined to write rapturously, “lovely life, beautiful world”. Would to God we saw it as God Himself saw it, who so loved the world.  This world is one of the glories of the universe!
Have I startled you?  If you could rise out of it and (stand) in some part of the universe, you would see a radiant orb, reflecting Uncreated Beauty, brilliantly radiant with rays of Divine light lighting it up everywhere. The Attributes of God reflected from all parts.(ON.V.5 No.125 p.99) 

In finding herself bound in love to her Creator, in having it revealed to her that she existed before her creation in the mind and heart of God, Mary Potter was able to understand, through her whole being, the meaning of the old catechism answer to the question: Why were we Created?  We were indeed created ‘to know, love and serve our God’ to give him praise without ceasing, and to live eternally with him in heaven.  Mary would elaborate on this when she wrote:

What is the object of this world?  Why is it created and placed in the universe? What is the position of the human race?  Why?  To reflect him, to mirror his beauty, to reflect the light, the radiant loveliness of the Divinity. Ah, ponder. Is this what the world is doing? Are you, in your little circumference striving to do this? Has the majority of mankind this attitude? Even with the good, is there not a certain unhealthy tone as regards their indifference to the world, and an air of not minding what happens to the world so long as they get to heaven?  Is this not ignoble? Does it show love of God and desire to extend his kingdom on earth?  If there is beauty in the world, it must be reflecting the Divinity, and we can multiply these reflections, these flashes, reflections of Divine Beauty. (ON. Vol 5, No.122 p.96)

“His divine eye dwells upon the beauties in the lives of those who really strive to walk in the steps of Jesus, who are patient under trials, who contemn not, when contemned (sic), who do good to those who injure them. Ah, these echoes of the Eternal should be continued - they might be, if people knew and valued the TRUTH (sic). (ON Vol 5, op.cit.) 

In the graced moments of her life, Mary Potter had felt the Divine impetus of love drawing her. As her loves were the loves of the heart of Jesus and the Mother heart of her mother Mary, she could not do other than work for that which they desired. There was the task of saving the dying sinner yes, but there was also the task of enabling people to give joy to their Creator by living the lives they had been created to live. This was the missionary task. And there was little Time.

We have but these few moments of time for seed sowing. There is the glorious harvest awaiting us. We could scarcely believe the fruit of our labours, the pure wheat watered by the Blood of Christ.  We strive to enrich Christ’s kingdom, to spread it, to adorn the Church, the glorious triumphant Church in heaven.  We have but the few days of time given to us and yet, though reason (when we think) shows us that we should lay up treasures in eternity, how difficult it is to move men’s minds to be earnest in this.  How often we hear the expression “I don’t mind so long as I can get into Heaven”. They do not think thus of earth. Likewise, it is not to God’s glory the way men think of this world.  We should love to make it beautiful in the sight of its Creator, enriching it with good works, imitating the great exemplar of mankind.  Not hurry-scurry, just keeping within the bounds, perhaps giving rich alms or exercising some natural virtues, but the building of that temple within - the systematic striving after perfection, the daily struggle to attain what God designed and to fulfil the will of God.....This is not instilled into souls as it should be from infancy, the striving for sanctity.  Children are brought up to seek to save their souls. It is put more as an extraneous and not an ordinary thing, the seeking to be saintly. Why, it seems sometimes, with certain souls, be thought unsafe, eccentric, almost presumption, the seeking sanctity, or, when signs of this tendency are discovered, it is thought to be a sign of vocation to religious life......(ON. Vol 5. p.95)

“It is therefore quite clear, that all Christians, in any state or walk of life are called to the fullness of Christian life and to the perfection of love, and by this holiness a more human manner of life is fostered also in earthly society. In order to reach this perfection, the faithful should use the strength dealt out to them by Christ’s gift, so that, following in his footsteps, and conformed to his image, doing the will of God in everything, they may wholeheartedly devote themselves to the glory of God and to the service of their neighbour” (Lumen Gentium Ch. 5 No.40)

The graces given Mary were what she called ‘working words’. They had drawn the soul of her into union with God, but they were also to be implemented in the world.  Mary would remember them all the years of her life. They were the keystone upon which the works that would be undertaken would be built, and as they were working words, they were dynamic. As Paul wrote:

“The word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and spirit, of joints and marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.  And before him, no creature is hidden, but all are open and laid bare to the eyes of him with whom we have to do” (Hebrews 4: 12-13).

Words that were Works  Back

With the impress of  ‘working words’ on the heart and the soul of Mary Potter, there was within her a growing sense of having to follow the inspirations that had been implanted. It was a responsibility that weighed heavily upon her, knowing as she did, that the graces received had to be brought into a living reality, if she was to be true to the call received: Reflecting in later years, on the task she had been given she would write:

Is it faith dear Lord? Jesus, faith is what we do not know.  Is it faith when thou art here so wonderfully. Thou art mine, my own  I do believe Jesus, thou has spoken this word to me, “Honour the Heart of my Mother.” My Jesus, am I not the hindrance to thy work being done better, thy word fulfilled. If thou gavest this mission to another, how I would pray and suffer for that one to......
My God, what is like the responsibility of a mission from heaven.  I do believe. “It is my will that you do this work”.  Yes, Mother, my Mother, the years have flown since thou didst whisper thus, in thy own sweet way. How have I done thy work?  Miserere: Magnificat.  Yes, Mother, sweet Mother, renew in me the grace of my confirmation. Hold your child to receive anew God’s spirit, charity, wisdom....(ON. Vol 1A, No. 26, p.53).

“that the dearest objects on earth to Jesus, were his Mother and his Church, and to his mother He confided the Church, and to the representative of the Church, St. John, he confided her. Then let Mary take her place in that Church.  Let it be known as hers, the dying gift of Jesus to his mother. (ON 1A p.47) 

Mary was the epitome of Christian life in human form. The love of her heart no more and no less than the absolute love of the Father. The young woman of Galilee was spouse of the Holy Spirit - how did she become that? By a pure exhalation of love: “ Be it done unto me, according to Thy word”.  The vacuum created by the setting aside of self for the love of God, enabled the Holy Spirit - the ‘breath of Love’ emanating from the Trinity,  to enter into to her - to take form and flesh of her. 
The graces offered Mary Potter, which she responded to, prepared her for this understanding. From the words of that first supreme recognition of herself as belonging to the Other - “The Blessed Trinity who made thee”, she had become aware of the longing desire of God for her to exist only in relation to Himself, and in total dependence upon himself.  She remained free to accept or reject the utterance of God. But the cost of acceptance was, and is, the invasion of God - the penetration of the soul by God himself. 

This then was the experience - the working word - of God. To draw others into the single hearted experience of God, in the Holy Spirit, that Mary had received at the moment of the Annunciation.  Mary Potter had been exposed to the wonder of the ‘way’ of Mary through the spiritual path of De Montfort.  She understood with a passionate intensity, the need to ‘learn of Mary’, but she understood also, the gift of the Path - that Mary herself was invested in bringing all to Jesus. Her power and grace would work in those souls who so abandoned themselves to her to be “reborn” in the image and likeness of the Son, through the power of the Holy Spirit:  Perhaps the point is better made with a reflection of Mary Potter on the mystery of the Annunciation:

The Annunciation:  I must stop and ponder, enter with Jesus into that calm sanctuary, as the Ecce Ancilla ascended from earth to heaven, the loveliest melody, the grandest chord, yet sounded on earth, working such a work.  Jesus is here, close to his mother’s heart. How sweet its beating to the word Incarnate.  All breathes God’s glory. That virgin heart, now enhanced with the beauty of Motherhood, is all instinct with holy desires that enamour the infant heart of Jesus.
But Mother, what we do we find? we were there with Jesus in the Virgin womb. Yes, the whole Church was embraced by the immaculate  (one) from the instant she conceived of the Holy Ghost......
The word Incarnate , born of her in time, she the virgin who gave him “peaceful rest” in her womb is honoured by Thee O God, in whose bosom he dwelt for all eternity in “unruffled repose”. May he take his delight in time in the hearts of those who love him with a special love, for they are nourished, guarded, cared for, protected by the mother of fair love, of holy hope................” (ON Vol 1A, No. 11, p.21)